Basketball, Flowers, and Musical Theatre
by imahistorian
Summary: In the end it was about more than a birthday. Kensi comes up with ways to try and make it up to Deeks for forgetting his birthday. Kensi POV, a series of 10 vignettes post 4x11 "Drive."
1. Non-Fat Latte

**Note: **First and foremost, this little story is in honor of **MioneAlterEgo**'s birthday. It's a birthday story and seemed like a serendipitous tribute to a wonderful friend and a great beta. Happy Birthday, Jenn! This is told in a similar vein as another story of mine, "Camisoles, Corduroy, and Lip Balm," though this one is from Kensi's POV on how she can try to make it up to Deeks for forgetting his birthday. There are ten chapters in total and I'll post one a day until completed. And check out the wonderful "Ice Cream, Confessions and the Wingnut Board" by **thepixiesmademedoit** - we both had ideas for post-Drive stories and made a pact to publish our stories together. Thank you, Anna, for the beta read and advice, and for being my fellow cliff-jumper.

Thank you for reading, and reviewing if you do!

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**Non-Fat Latte**

Okay, so I screwed up.

I didn't realize it immediately, but it didn't take me too long to realize Deeks was actually hurt by my forgetting his birthday. Birthdays aren't really a big deal to me, have never been a big deal. At least not since my family was something resembling whole. You have to make things mean less when there aren't people around to celebrate them.

Despite my hang-ups, it wasn't until today, January 8, 2013, that I realized how important birthdays are to Deeks. Especially when he hopefully asked me a second time if my dinner reservations included him.

Big fat fail, Kensi.

The thing is, I didn't mean to hurt Deeks by forgetting. And looking back I can see how he was trying to remind me all day, how he expected that I knew it was his birthday. But there was being undercover, almost getting killed, and almost getting Jaime killed distracting me.

I'm not used to thinking about other people the way I do with Deeks. He's managed to become the person first on my mind, even if I can't always show it the way normal people do. Even if I don't always understand our connection. And even if I'm slow to get that a cutting remark or a glance from me can hit him harder than it would from other people.

All through dinner with Jaime and his mom I tried to think of a way to make it up to Deeks. Not because I care about birthdays all that much, but because Deeks cares about his birthday. And when I finally came up with my plan I felt relief. I could make this right between us.

The next morning, I made sure to show up at Deeks' house well before he usually left. And it turned out I was way early because he answered the door with his hair rumpled from sleep and dragging his feet like a little kid reluctant to go to school. But he saw the non-fat latte in my hands, with the words "Happy Belated Birthday, Marty!" scrawled on the side and he managed a slight smile. I blamed that barista who has a crush on Deeks for the notation since I'd let it slip the coffee was for him as a sort of consolation for the forgotten day before.

He drank a few sips and I hurriedly laid out my plan. And tried to ignore how nervous I felt, hoping this Hail Mary would fix things. Or at least start to fix things. I'd missed his birth DAY, but it was still his birth MONTH. So I would find ways to make up for having forgotten his birthday, starting right then. With the coffee he likes. Even though I think the laundry list of directions he gives when he orders is ridiculously fussy.

Thing is, I didn't have any trouble remembering exactly how Deeks likes his coffee. I was relieved to see his cautious, yet accepting, smile as I offered up my plan and I tried not to examine too closely how important seeing that smile was.

And when I told Deeks about the night before, starting with Jaime's hopeful expression when I'd arrived at dinner and ending with Jaime's mother inviting me to his cousin's Quinceañera next weekend, the grin slowly lit his face and his chuckle was light as he shook his head in amusement at me. I think there's probably a lesson about karma in there somewhere.

But I had a month to make it up to him. Starting with that non-fat latte.

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**Next: **Flowers


	2. Flowers

**Note: **Thanks for reading, reviewing, and following/alerting along! Kensi does have her work cut out for her. And now, Chapter 2:

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**Flowers**

Even though my plan was, in general, to do nice things for Deeks during the month of his birthday, I couldn't resist having a little fun with it. And I couldn't have Callen and Sam thinking I've gone soft on Deeks. At least not too soft. It's an appearances thing. Deeks might like to think he's the alpha dog in our partnership, but it's a tricky balance. Him believing that, and me letting him.

For his second birthday surprise, I decided to get Deeks flowers. I tend to think flowers are a terrible gift since in my experience they follow apologies, but they're also a little cheesy and something told me Deeks would love it. And this was part of an apology of sorts.

One afternoon at lunch when things were a little slow, I grabbed Nell, whispering to her that I needed her help. She willingly went along, merely raised a curious eyebrow when I parked in front of the floral shop. Once I explained my mission to Nell she was ready and eager to help. The florist volunteered to bundle a vase of flowers together but I declined. I had a feeling Deeks would like it better if I selected the flowers.

Nell picked out the vase and the greenery to go along with the flowers and I started to hunt through the buckets of fresh flowers. The selection of flowers in January is a little scarce, even in southern California. At a certain point I realized I was overthinking my selections. But somewhere along the way it became important that the flowers themselves meant something more.

Blue Hyacinths because the petals look like starfish and the color reminded me of the ocean. Yellow Hellebore because it looked like a sun bursting. White Snowdrops because they seemed to droop over sadly. And purple and black Pansies because they are bright and happy looking.

As the florist did some quick arranging I started to question the oddity of my botanical choices. Before I could chicken out the flowers were paid for, handed back, and Nell and I returned to OSP.

Just as I expected, the guys gave Deeks some good-natured ribbing over the flowers gifted to him by his female partner. But after their attention drifted away I saw how Deeks looked at the flowers, the arrangement a smattering of random and colorful thoughtfulness, and when he looked up at me from across the room I could have sworn he saw what I did in the flowers. His eyes. His smile. The look on his face on his birthday. The way he changes how I see the world.

The next day when I went to pick Deeks up, his elderly neighbor caught me at the walkway and asked if I was the sweet woman who had made Marty smile with a love bouquet. I managed to stammer out something resembling a denial until Deeks rescued me by appearing, then damned me further when his arm snaked around my waist as he implied a romantic relationship I didn't have the heart to disagree with when I saw the wistful look on the woman's face. It didn't seem like it would harm anything to let her draw an incorrect conclusion. She was obviously very fond of Deeks.

I even managed not to drop my smile when his fingers squeezed my hip, his hand warm and rough as it dipped under the hem of my shirt. And I tried not to think about the blush I could feel creeping up my neck, no doubt visible on my face. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Deeks' grin, which revealed how much he enjoyed my squirming.

He ignored my pointed look after the women left, then turned back to close his door. As he locked the door of his apartment I glimpsed my flowers prominently displayed inside. I may not like receiving flowers, but I have to admit giving them felt better than I could have imagined.

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**Next: **Paperwork


	3. Paperwork

**Note: **If you're wondering, this will be ten chapters in total, one per day barring any technical malfunctions. Thank you for reading and reviewing if you do! And now, onto the third gift for Deeks...

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**Paperwork**

Even though Deeks knew I was going to spend the month doing some nice things for him, I could tell he was still skeptical of my motivations since I'd forgotten his specific birthday date. Really, I'd misplaced it by ten days. Some of the usual teasing was absent from the hours we spent together and I'd been trying not to let it bother me. I was starting to wonder if this might have been the thing to push the boundaries of what he's willing to take from me. Many things once broken are never quite whole again.

It was a Friday night after a long day after a long week when I told Deeks that I would finish up the report on the afternoon's chase and gun battle. Our case resolved itself in our favor in the end, but I was nursing a pulled shoulder muscle and a killer headache. Still, I'd seen Deeks take some punches from our suspect and his knuckles were beginning to turn an array of painful colors.

Unfortunately, NCIS policy dictated that unless you were in the hospital incident reports had to be filled out within 24 hours. But it was Friday and I had nothing else to do other than go home and fall asleep in my bathtub. Might as well finish the paperwork and give Deeks a break. I was pretty sure Deeks was in more pain than me so I urged him to go home while I finished up our report.

As I wrote the report and laid out the series of events that started with us on foot and in pursuit of our suspect, I remembered how we'd had to split up, uncertain which way the errant lieutenant had gone. I'd seen that look in Deeks' eyes, the one that said he didn't like being away from me, not being able to watch my back. I hadn't liked it either once I caught up to our suspect and he cornered me and managed to knock me to the ground.

The fall to the ground had been responsible for my muscle strain, and the headache thanks to when our suspect pulled me to my feet and shoved me against the wall, a gun under my chin. The brick wall hadn't been kind to my skull. And even though the pain certainly wasn't pleasant, I hadn't felt any panic. I knew Deeks would be there. I knew he would come for me.

And he certainly had. The arms that held me to the wall released me. From my vantage point slumped on the ground I'd seen Deeks take a punch to the jaw and in the stomach before he'd swung back. I've seen Deeks many ways. Cocky. Flirty. Angry. Concerned. Amused. And so many emotions, from hurt to embarrassment even. But this was different. This was focused rage.

It wasn't until later, writing out the details of the afternoon, that I realized what Deeks saw when he came around that corner. A gun under my chin, and me pinned to a brick wall. I knew Deeks was protective of me though he does try to hide it. I think he worries that I'll be annoyed. Truth be told, it's nice to know someone worries about me.

Deeks came back then, surprising me as he entered the bullpen carrying a bag from In-N-Out, and better yet, a heating pad and a couple of cold compresses. At my weak protestations he silenced me, telling me he was just doing what partners do for each other, and he shoved the bag of food onto my lap, plugged in the heating pad to arrange it on my shoulder. He didn't have to be told where I was injured. Deeks just knew.

We traded off for the next few hours. Eating, filling out the paperwork, and switching from the hot to the cold to ease our injuries. When we finally finished and walked out, throwing away the trash from our food, Deeks followed me to my car and pressed the heating pad into my hands. And when he showed up the next morning to check on me, coffee and scones in hand, I wasn't surprised. He was just doing what partners do.

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**Next: **Free Pass


	4. Free Pass

**Note: **I'm so pleased to hear people are enjoying this little story. I've loved writing it. Thanks for the follows, alerts, favorites, and reviews. I appreciate them! On to gift #4!

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**Free Pass**

The week after Deeks' birthday I finally had the opportunity to offer up his next birthday gift. We were waiting for some tracking results from Eric, killing a few hours across the city since it didn't make much sense to drive all the way back to OSP just to leave again. I was driving that day, though I had been trying to be more lenient and occasionally let Deeks take the wheel.

We stopped for lunch and I purposely pulled into a parking lot close to the beach and next to a surf equipment rental shop that looked rather economically deprived. At Deeks' hopeful look I paused, realizing that behind that hope there was the expectation I would say no. I enjoyed the surprise that lit his face when I explained that he was getting a free pass. An hour of surfing and no lectures or complaining from me. I'd even watch his stuff from the safety of the beach.

Deeks was out of the car before I could utter another word and not five minutes later he'd returned with a rented board and wetsuit pulled halfway up his body. Staying true to my word, I'd found a spot on the sand, one I'd picked for the clear view of the waves. Deeks dumped his clothing in a haphazard pile and I shook my head silently, and reached for the jeans to fold them. And I really couldn't say exactly why, but I blushed uncontrollably when my fingers found the heat from his body still warmed the rough denim and soft cotton of his t-shirt.

In an attempt to distract myself, I turned towards Deeks where he was waxing his board and any thought of strictly reminding him of the time constraints of his free pass vanished when I saw his bare skin, the wetsuit riding precariously low on his hips, and the sun gleaming over his back.

I don't know what struck me to silence. It wasn't the first time I'd seen Deeks without a shirt on. I've even seen him surf before so it wasn't like that was new. Maybe it was some odd combination of the bite in the January air, the almost blinding southern California sun and the wind lifting off the waves. And it might have had something to do with the carefree smile Deeks threw my way.

Deeks is usually a pretty upbeat and seemingly happy guy. I think that most of the time it isn't even an act. But I know he has demons, just like the rest of us. And some days there isn't enough beer and ice cream in the world to make what we do and see okay. I'm glad to be the one who sees when he's battling his demons because I knew if he didn't trust me I would never see that side of him. Because true, carefree, happy moments unhindered by work and the past are kind of rare.

Deeks didn't seem to notice my observation of him as he finished with the board, and then slipped his arms into the wetsuit, reaching behind his neck to zip it closed. He was on his feet, lifted the board in one fluid movement, and he tossed me a wave as he ran towards the water.

I think part of why I wanted to give Deeks this free pass was because I know I sometimes make it hard for Deeks to feel like we're equals. I think I even kind of do it on purpose, even though I don't set out to. I demand to drive, I pick the radio station, and I like to be in control. Usually Deeks goes along with it because he really is generally that easygoing. And sometimes I'm a little more demanding than I normally might be because I want to see if he'll push back.

But more often than not, Deeks takes it. He doesn't hesitate to take my demands, from the mundane to the slightly control freak, and accept them. Sure, he gives me hell about the techno music and the stashes of candy, but there's a kind of affectionate acceptance. Which is why I wanted to accept something that is a big part of who he is, something he loves to do.

Because watching him surf, it's clear he loves it. And I can't deny how good he looks out on the water. He's free and happy and I feel lucky to see him like that.

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**Next: **Haircut


	5. Haircut

**Note: **Thanks for following on, and for the reviews, alerts, and favorites. It bears repeating that my deepest thanks go to Anna, **thepixiesmademedoit**, for her immeasurable help and support in writing this.This is the halfway point, five more to go after this one! I hope you enjoy, thanks for reading and reviewing if you do!

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**Haircut**

It was all Sam's fault.

Even though it was probably totally irrational of me to blame Sam for the predicament I found myself in, I'm still going to blame him. Because I wouldn't be thinking the things I'm thinking if it weren't for Sam's teasing. I'm not even sure how the conversation began. But it proceeded towards Sam's good-natured teasing of Deeks' hair. Considering Sam has no hair, he finds no end of amusement over Deeks' more wild and free appearance.

Truthfully, I've never found longer hair on men attractive. And if you'd asked me a couple years ago, I would have said the unshaven thing just makes a guy look sloppy and lazy. For reasons I keep to myself, I've lessened my more severe critique of unshaven men with longer hair. Well, one particular scruffy, long-haired man. Not that I would ever let him know that.

I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped as Sam made some comment about how it must be impossible for Deeks to see through the hair in his eyes. Sam may have even compared Deeks to a Shih-Tzu. Deeks defended that he did need to get a haircut but hadn't had the time and Sam laid into him about time management. I don't even know where the thought came from, let alone the words that were out before I allowed them: I offered to cut Deeks' hair as another of his birthday gifts. I thought I heard crickets in the silence following my proposal.

His quick and severe skepticism just seemed to urge me on. I really don't have any hidden talent when it comes to cutting hair, except that I sometimes trim my bangs, but the thought that Deeks assumed I couldn't do it sealed the deal. Deeks and I, neither one of us is usually all that inclined to back down from a challenge (real or perceived) once issued. And I privately wanted to see how far Deeks would let me take it.

Which is how Deeks ended up leaning back in a chair, his head tipped back into my sink. His balance was precarious, and when the chair wobbled a little Deeks' eyes flew open and locked on my face, his hands automatically going to my waist to steady himself. And I was frozen in silence and movement, his face close enough to mine that I had to concentrate so his features didn't blur. It was his blue eyes that I focused on, those curious, surprised, and amused blue eyes.

Deeks grinned at me, the shift in his gaze knowing as he glanced down, clueing me in to how my upper body was pressed against him. Before he could make a suggestive comment I doused his head in warm water, then reached for the shampoo, which provided a much-needed diversion. Except the distraction only worked for a second, and then I was focused on how Deeks hummed contentedly as I rubbed his scalp. For his occasional complaining, Deeks wasn't really high maintenance about much. Except probably his hair and his gun. And being out in the desert.

I think it was the quiet trust in how he relaxed under my hands that kind of threw me. It takes a lot for people in our line of work to truly trust others. And yet Deeks was there, eyes closed, literally off balance, and he seemed comfortable letting me have full rein. Which was why my heart may have melted a little as he let me snip and cut, short tufts of golden hair littering my kitchen floor. And he didn't say a word in protest. As it turned out, Deeks really only needed a trim and it wasn't too hard since his hair is kind of like organized chaos anyway.

And in the end, when I found myself focused on how close Deeks was and how the warmth of his body seeped into mine as I leaned over him to wash his hair, I cursed Sam for starting this chain of events that was leading me to think about my partner in ways I've resolutely tried not to.

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**Next: **Basketball


	6. Basketball

**Note: **I'm so glad to hear from those of you reading that you enjoy the story. Thanks for the alerts, reviews, and favorites. And just for generally reading along. On to gift #6!

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**Basketball**

My next idea for a birthday gift surprise for Deeks just about fell literally into my lap.

I walked into Ops one afternoon and found Deeks and Nell engaged in a spirited debate. It took me a few seconds to realize they were arguing about sports. A few more seconds told me their discussion was about which sport was better: football or basketball. Nell is a somewhat recent convert to football, but she has picked up the obsession like a lifelong fan. And Deeks, for reasons I've never been clear on, is a devoted L.A. Clippers fan.

The discussion was interrupted with a case, and a few hours later I found myself sidled up to a bar at a fancy restaurant where not a single drink was in the single digits. Deeks and I were backup to Sam and Callen and I tried not to watch too closely as Deeks chatted up a stacked blonde at the other end of the bar.

I was given the perfect diversion from watching Deeks flirt when the couple next to me began to argue. Within seconds it became clear that the woman was breaking up with the guy because he'd cheated and he wasn't taking it well. When she got up to leave, he grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the door, causing her to cry out in pain, so I stepped in. I probably shouldn't have, not while I was undercover. But there was no way I was going to let him drag her out of there.

One well placed heel onto his foot and a knee to his groin later and the guy was left whimpering on the floor. I caught the disapproving look on Deeks' face, along with the contrary smile that tugged at his mouth, in his reflection in the mirror behind the bar as I turned to see if the woman was okay. She was a little shaken up and it was then that Deeks and I got the signal to move out.

It wasn't until the next day, after our case was resolved, that I thought about the woman. I got her name and phone number from Eric, who'd tracked it from her credit card used in the bar, and I had only a second's hesitation before I dialed her number. Getting involved might not have been the smartest thing. But I had to make sure she was okay.

As it turned out the woman was fine. And she kept insisting that she wanted to thank me for what I did. It wasn't until she told me where she worked that I realized the perfect answer was right in front of me. And when I voiced my request, the words were barely out before she'd agreed.

It was a few days later that I walked into OSP with a basketball under my arm. The guys looked at me curiously until I threw the ball to Deeks. He turned the ball over in his hands and I saw the second he recognized the signatures nearly covering the rounded surface of the basketball. His fingers nearly released in shock, then he held on to the ball tight like he would never let go.

Deeks was so quietly shocked that I had to explain to Callen and Sam that the basketball was covered in autographs from the players of the L.A. Clippers. The woman I'd helped was an office manager for the team and I'd asked her for a signed basketball. She'd been more than happy to oblige, especially after I told her the ball was for my boyfriend. I didn't tell the guys that part. I'd lied to make my story easier to sell, but they didn't need to know that.

Deeks' awed thank you made my stomach flip in a way that I couldn't explain or understand. As if they sensed the undercurrent of emotions in the bullpen, the guys took off for the shooting range. When Deeks reached for my hand, squeezing it gently as he leaned in to gently kiss my cheek I felt my eyes widen in pleasant surprise. And I tried not to blush as Deeks backed away, grinned, and took the stairs up to Ops two at a time to show the basketball off to Nell.

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**Next: **Gun Cleaning


	7. Gun Cleaning

**Note:** I'm not really a gun expert, but I can do research with the best of them. Hopefully I got it mostly right. It feels a bit repetitive to just keep saying thank you, but I do appreciate all the interest in this story, so: Thank you! For reading, and reviewing if you do.

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**Gun Cleaning**

It was fear that motivated my next birthday surprise for Deeks.

Late on a Friday we were chasing a suspect through a darkened warehouse and Deeks was ahead of me. When the petty officer began shooting at us we took cover and then returned fire. Tag teaming, Deeks covered me as I got closer to the suspect and then I provided cover for Deeks to join me behind a steel shipment container.

I volunteered to draw the petty officer's fire but as I dodged a few stray bullets and found cover behind a crate I expected additional fire that didn't come. The immediate unease that swirled in my gut wasn't something I could ignore. I retraced my steps back to Deeks and found him on his knees, his hands behind his head, the petty officer pressing a gun to his head.

My reaction was immediate as I shot the petty officer, my aim deadly accurate. I verified the man was dead and unarmed even while my first screaming instinct was to check on Deeks, knowing I needed to follow protocol. When I could finally turn to Deeks, the almost ashen color of his face told me the truth. The situation had been as bad as it looked. When I asked what had happened, Deeks shakily told me that his gun had misfired and the petty officer got the drop on him.

We were soon joined on the scene by Callen and Sam, and after the coroner arrived we were free to return to OSP. Callen and Sam went to brief Hetty, and Deeks and I headed to the armory to stow our gear. I realized I felt a mixture of anger and fear as I watched Deeks pull his gun out, examining it closely with unease. My anger was irrationally directed at his gun for failing him. It hit me then how close he'd come to a bullet in the head, how close I'd come to losing my partner.

My anger faded at the apprehension I saw in the slump of Deeks' shoulders. Deeks was so particular about his firearm, because when it came to his safety during a firefight, in the past he was often the only one looking out for himself. It had to be a blow that his weapon, one of the tools he has relied on so strongly, nearly cost him his life.

I came up behind Deeks and with a hand on his shoulder, turned him towards me. And when I offered to clean his gun, giving it the thorough Blye Seal of Approval, I saw the gratitude in his eyes and I was relieved that I could maybe bring some of his confidence back. Before we were partners I'm not sure Deeks really trusted anyone to watch his back, let alone clean his weapon.

Deeks sat quietly next to me and watched as I disassembled his gun. My movements efficient, I started by removing the magazine, then released the slide and slid out the barrel. I worked every surface with cleaner and fabric, worked to reach every crevice and remove any grime or debris. It didn't surprise me that I didn't find any obvious problem with Deeks' gun. He has always been very careful with his firearm. But flukes did happen, no matter how well maintained a weapon was.

Once I'd wiped the trigger and safety, I reversed my earlier movements and reassembled the gun, finishing by loading the magazine and putting the safety on. I gently put the gun on the table in front of Deeks and watched as he picked up the weapon, his eyes drifting over what had nearly failed him earlier that night. I felt a surge of protective instinct. He had me. I hadn't failed him.

I watched the assurance return to his face, and he breathed a little easier when I commented that freak incidents with guns happened and there was nothing wrong with his gun that I could see. He didn't question me further, just nodded and took confidence in my words. And somehow, I felt better having seen and inspected his weapon for myself. I knew he was in good hands.

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**Next: **Blind Date


	8. Blind Date

**Note: **We're getting close to the end now, two more to go after this one. My deepest thanks for following, alerting, reviewing, and reading along. Even though things have been going so well with Kensi's gift giving, it's time to shake things up. At least a little! And now, "gift" #8 . . .

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**Blind Date**

Over this month of birthday gifting for Deeks I'd been trying to ignore how doing nice things for him, thinking of ways to make him smile, had actually made me happier, and how that made me look at him different. I know things between Deeks and me are complex. We're partners, but its more than that. Trying to explain that "more" wasn't something either of us was in a rush to do.

In a fashion I'm sure Nate would say was typical of me, I overcompensated for the slightly uncomfortable, slightly unwelcome, very confusing feelings. I set Deeks up on a blind date.

It had been months ago, probably totally forgotten by Deeks, that he'd teasingly asked me to set him up with one of my clubbing friends. He'd complained I wasn't a good wingman, I'd countered that I wasn't his pimp. Deeks had never met my friends, but had rightfully concluded they were very attractive women. I don't even know these women all that well. But with clubs, safety is in numbers and it is more fun to drink with fellow girlfriends. A group of attractive women is harder for some guys to approach than one woman is, making it easier to weed out the creeps.

It just occurred to me to blurt out to Deeks that I would set him up with one of my friends. The look of surprise on his face and his quick decline only seemed to spur me on. I couldn't quite battle the unfamiliar emotions roiling through my head. So I tried to redirect them. I picked one of the women from my clubbing friends, taking pains to ensure she was petite, blonde, blue eyed, beautiful, bubbly, and as refreshingly unhindered by drama as could be. Once I'd given them each the other's phone numbers I'd hoped that I would feel better. Ignorance was bliss and all that. I figured pushing Deeks towards another woman would provide some needed distance.

I couldn't have been more wrong. It provided all kinds of distance I didn't want. It provided me with an unwelcome welling of delayed jealousy and anger directed at myself that I had no outlet for. Except at a punching bag. As Deeks went off to meet Kristen for dinner I retreated to the gym at Ops and failed at my attempts to tell myself I didn't care that he was having a perfectly charming evening with a beautiful woman nothing like me that I had set up for him.

I did it to myself. I had no one to blame but me. It was self-sabotaging and I'd known it even as I did it. But I did it anyway. I couldn't quite reconcile how my feelings for Deeks, for my partner, might be changing. But most of all, I didn't know what to do about it. And a small part of me wondered if I was giving him what I thought he wanted.

Not much time passed and I was startled when Deeks came up behind me, a hand flat and low on my back. I yelped in surprise, and whirled around to find him standing there, dressed for his date with Kristen, and holding take out from Miceli's. My stomach actually flipped in surprise and growled in hunger in the same instant.

I couldn't quite stammer out a question and Deeks told me, all the while spreading a blanket on the gym floor and unloading containers of food, that while Kristen had seemed entirely nice, it had only taken him a few minutes to figure out where he'd rather be. When I managed to flippantly point out that I thought she was exactly his type, the steady and heated glance he directed at me silenced the words that strained to get out and question him further.

I realized in that second that I didn't know what was going on between us. But Deeks had gotten the best Italian food in Hollywood and he'd brought it back to me. That meant something. If nothing else, it meant dinner with my partner. And that was impossible to pass up. As was the man who offered it.

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**Next: **Musical Theatre


	9. Musical Theatre

**Note: **Thanks to everyone for reading along and reviewing! We're reaching the end now, one more chapter after this one. I have a special love for this chapter and the musical mentioned. I think I've been searching for a chance to use the quote below for years. I hope you enjoy.

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**Musical Theatre**

Things had changed between Deeks and me. It started the night I tried to set him up on a blind date. Really, it probably started before then. But something had definitely been altered. The last several weeks of trying to think of ways to make it up to him for forgetting his birthday, of doing things for him, or giving him gifts I think he'd like, have made me think about my partner in different ways.

Deeks enjoys life. Despite a history piled with reasons why he should be a negative person, he isn't. He cares about other people; catches the small clues when something might be off. He can read me with a kind of absolute certainty that almost scares me. He's dedicated to his job and to seeing justice done. I knew all this before. It really isn't brand new information. But it's like the act of me misplacing Deeks' birthday has opened a door. It's like it has opened my eyes.

I didn't think anyone had the power to do that to me anymore. I certainly didn't allow it. But Deeks has never been one to ask for permission. And even though I could probably stop with the gifts, I didn't want to. The quiet delight he seemed to get from them gave me a whisper of a thrill. It made me want to think of things he would like. And that has just made me want to know more about him. It has made me want to do things and consider things I might not have before.

Like going to see a high school musical production of _The Music Man_. I never would have pegged Deeks for a musical theatre fan. But one morning while Deeks was talking with Hetty I'd snagged his iPod, scrolling through it for ideas of music he might like, maybe for maybe a concert we could go to. A new idea bloomed when I saw the volume of show tune playlists.

When I presented Deeks with the tickets the sparkle in his eyes and the pleased bark of laughter that escaped his mouth made me smile automatically. Although I've never been a fan of musicals, I figured I could try and see it through Deeks' eyes.

The production was a little patched together, the sets clearly home made by teenagers, the singing only half decent. But it was hard to deny how much fun the kids playing the roles were having. I'd never seen _The Music Man_, or any musical theatre. It's basically a story about a con man named Harold Hill who fools an entire town into believing he's a music instructor and he sells them all instruments and uniforms with promises of a grand performance he has no skill in delivering.

All the while, Hill has to dodge the suspicions of Marian, the local librarian and piano teacher, who, against her better judgment, is charmed and won over by the con man to the point that she willingly covers for him. Marian finds out who he is, all his mistakes and flaws, and she still saves him. As it turns out, Hill isn't such a bad guy and he comes to care for Marian and the town.

Watching the musical, I could understand Marian's predicament. Sometimes people really could hit you like a lightning bolt. When you least expected or wanted it. And sometimes it was hard not to be stubborn about the change ahead of you. Of the scary unknown. But then all it might take was someone equally stubborn about not giving up.

_You pile up enough tomorrows, and you'll find you are left with nothing but a lot of empty yesterdays. I don't know about you, but I'd like to make today worth remembering._

I couldn't explain the lump in my throat, or the burning of unshed tears in my eyes as Harold Hill spoke to Marian. And I couldn't say why I reached for Deeks' hand, gripping his fingers tightly, as I held on to him. I just knew I couldn't accept a tomorrow without Deeks.

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**Next: **Dinner


	10. Dinner

**Note: **It's the last chapter, so it's a little longer. And we get some *dialogue* for a change! If you've been reading, thank you for following along. I'm grateful for the reviews and encouragement, they have all much appreciated. Once again, my big thanks to Anna **(thepixiesmademedoit) **for the advice, corrections, and support. And a 10 days later (once again) Happy Birthday to Jenn **(MioneAlterEgo), **who this was written for.

I'm sure I'll be back with some shorter stories or one-shots in the future, but now it's back to my longer story after this bit of a break. Thanks for reading and reviewing if you do, I hope you enjoy the conclusion. And if you are so inclined on your way out, I'd be curious to know if you had a favorite birthday "gift."

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**Dinner**

I went from thinking about who Deeks is as my partner, to thinking about who he is as my friend and wanting to be someone he can rely on. I don't want him to think he can't count on me. I realized deep down that that was what all the birthday gifts came back around to. I may not have initially realized what forgetting his birthday meant, but I'd let him down. I was proving myself to him, wanting him to believe in me. His belief in me was something I was only just beginning to understand was fundamentally important to me. And even though Deeks had seemingly been won over by my efforts, he hadn't said the words yet.

As a sort of last hurrah, I told Deeks I would make dinner for him as my final birthday gift. It's true I don't really cook. But I can heat up precooked dishes and mix spinach dip like a perfect party hostess. And in the fine tradition of Blye family dining, I invited Deeks over for Appetizer Dinner.

Once Deeks arrived I explained to him this particular tradition. Instead of an actual meal with specific courses, like soup, salad, entrée, and dessert, Appetizer Dinner was something my parents had come up with when I was little and something of a picky eater. For kids things like mini pizzas, corndogs, chicken nuggets, even cut up fruits and vegetables become more fun. My parents eventually supplemented that with other dishes like French fries, hummus, and various vegetable dips. Apparently I'd been a difficult and stubborn kid when it came to food.

After my mom left the tradition kind of died away. As an adult, Appetizer Dinner for myself was a lot of work for one person. As I finished explaining all this to Deeks I was suddenly aware of how hard and loud my heart was beating, and of how long I'd been talking, completely uninterrupted as I spilled a family story I'd never told anyone. I stole a glance at Deeks, acutely aware of how I wanted him to understand the unspoken message in what I was telling him.

On the surface it wasn't a big thing. People had dinner all the time. But I wouldn't do this with someone else, or for someone else. Just for him. I hesitated to even think the word "family," as applicable as it had become in my apprehensive heart.

Deeks looked at me, the softness and understanding in his eyes a reassuring answer. I covered up the relief I felt by handing Deeks a plate and urging him to dig in. We settled into the chairs on my patio, enjoying the warmth of a January in southern California, the silence interrupted by the occasional murmur of appreciation for the food from Deeks.

I gathered my courage and finally blurted out the words I'd been thinking for weeks. "I really am sorry about forgetting your birthday, Deeks."

"You didn't forget my birthday, you just missed it by a bit," He paused, shooting me a wry smile as he continued. "You mistook the date, misplaced it. I know it wasn't intentional."

I sighed, feeling guilty for my relief at his words. Deeks was letting me off the hook. And it wasn't a kindness I necessarily wanted to just accept. "Mistaken, misplaced, or missed, I'm still sorry."

"I know you are. I've known since that night. I can admit I was upset at first, but that's long gone."

I chewed my lower lip, accepting that I'd hurt him. I spoke softly. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

Deeks turned to smile at me, the grin fully reaching his eyes. "I know, Kens. It's okay, I forgive you. That's what friends do. Especially when you mean the apology."

"How do you know I mean my apology?" I asked him curiously. Deeks looked at my strangely.

"I seriously doubt you would have done all those things over the last month if you didn't mean it. And it wasn't the things themselves that told me. It was the things you did, the thoughtfulness. That alone told me that I mean something to you."

I thought about how second nature it had become to think of Deeks first, to want to surprise him with gifts and gestures. Then I shocked us both, reaching out to lay a hand on his forearm, my voice strong with conviction as the words tumbled out before I could really consider them, parse them out, or edit them down. "You've always meant something. You do mean something to me. More than something."

Deeks stared into my eyes, his gaze searching and hopeful in a way beyond the usual questions that came about through the time we spent together as partners. This was more than asking if I was okay after being shot at, if I'd filled out the proper report paperwork for Hetty, or if I wanted to get beers after work. This was asking a bigger question, one I thought I might finally be ready to at least consider. I might finally be able to not disappoint that hope in his eyes.

"Really?" Deeks asked me softly, turning his chair towards mine and leaning forward to trap my knees between his. "Now that sounds like something worth finding out more about."

Deeks' lips were gentle against mine when he kissed me, cautious as if he thought I might pull back or push him away. But I'd spent so much of the last month thinking about him, thinking about us, and I'd finally understood how important he was to me. Not just as a partner and friend.

I fiercely kissed Deeks back, sliding to the edge of my seat to be closer as I slid my hands up his chest, feeling the muscles I'd seen when he went surfing on the day I gave him his free pass to surf, to his neck where I threaded my fingers through the hair I'd cut earlier that month. I swallowed his exhalation of my name, the relief and awe in his tone making my heart hammer even louder in my head.

When Deeks pulled back after a few minutes, chuckling and a little flustered by my enthusiastic response, I couldn't change the grin I felt spread over my face.

"Wow. With a response like that, you can forget my birthday any year you want."

I laughed in response, knowing the date would be forever etched in my memory. But even something that had started out bad could be turned into something good. Strange as it seemed now, I was almost glad I'd forgotten about the importance of January 8th since it made me see what was right in front of me all along.

In the end it was about more than a birthday.

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**END**


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